I transitioned in the 1990’s. Despite there being no legal protections back then, and no gender affirming care for minors, in many ways things were easier at that time because most of society just didn’t even know we existed, and when they would find out, for the most part they didn’t care. Today, though, there is an international movement to oppress us through the law and we are attacked nearly every day by transphobic politicians and activists. Today’s generation of people just coming to terms with their gender face a very hostile environment and have difficult obstacles to overcome. That is why I got back in touch with the trans community a few years ago after being absent from it for two decades. I thought that given all that is going on the transitioners of today could use the moral support of someone who’s been through everything already and come out the other side happier and healthier than before.

To that end I joined a Discord server for trans folk in my city and after a while I became a moderator for the server. Most of the time we just chat about random things, but when someone has an emotional crisis, as happens on a regular basis, I do my best to provide comfort and what wisdom I have to offer to help people get through the bad times.

A few days ago, someone actually brought all this up and thanked me for what I do, and said that I was an inspiration to her and showed her that all she is going through really is worth the effort. Several other people echoed her sentiments after that. I felt very humbled, but also grateful to know that my efforts have not been in vain.

So what about you, trans elder out there in the wilds of the Internet? How long has it been since you attended a support group meeting or talked to newly hatched eggs? You may think you have nothing to gain from getting involved in that community again, but I assure you that you do have something to give! Your simple presence would provide a visible example of what these new transitioners could acheive. Your presence would help to assure them that their efforts are not in vain, that the struggle is worth the effort and the pain, because beyond those things lies joy and self fulfillment.

And you may, like me, find that you do still have things to learn, yourself. Watching these young men and women come to know themselves has inspired me to do my own soul searching, and I’ve opened up parts of me that I didn’t even know were still locked away. This past week I’ve even been experiencing something that I hadn’t felt in a long time: real gender euphoria! I feel wonderful and amazed about who I am now, and I feel incredibly grateful for everything I’ve become.

So please, consider spending some of your free time talking to the current generation of transitioners. They could use your help, and you might find that you can use theirs as well. Our community doesn’t have to be fleeting, as I wrote earlier. A true community has it’s youth, it’s adults, and it’s elders and the trans community would be so much stronger if it followed the same model.